Child Custody and Divorce

When child custody must be determined because of a couple’s divorce, the custody arrangement becomes part of the divorce decree. The divorce decree assigns the parent with whom the child will reside, how visitation will be dealt with, and who will provide monetary support. Courts consider a custody award to be subjected to change until the child reaches the right age and in most states proof of a change in circumstances may repeal an earlier award.

In a simple divorce involving at least one child, permanent physical custody is granted to the parent with whom the child will reside most of the time. Typically, the custodial parent shares joint legal custody with the non-custodial parent. This means that the custodial parent must inform and consult with the non-custodial parent regarding the child’s education, health care, and other concerns. In these situations, courts may order visitation or what is also called temporary custody between the child and the non-custodial parent. A schedule with specific dates and time may be written into the order or the court may simply declare that visitation should be reasonable.

The usual arrangement is subjected to some exceptions. There are some courts that allow parents to retain joint physical custody wherein the child spends equal time with both parents. On the other hand, many courts refuse ordering joint custody if either parent does not want it because of the high level of cooperation it requires particularly when the child involved is young or if the parents live in separate states.

Split custody is an arrangement wherein the parents divide custody of their children, with each parent being granted physical custody of one or more children. Generally, the court tries not to separate siblings when granting child custody.

Unmarried Parents

If the parents of a child were never married, most states provide that the biological mother of the child has sole physical custody. This is unless the biological father takes action to have him considered for child custody such as obtaining a finding of paternity and filing a petition for custody. Usually, an unwed father cannot win custody from a mother who is a good parent. However, he may have priority over other people who want to adopt his child such as relatives, foster parents, or strangers.

Awarding of Child Custody

A judge awards child custody depending on what he or she believes to be in the best interest of the child. This can be determined by considering important factors such as the each parent’s health, lifestyle and financial situation as well as the child’s age, gender, health, current lifestyle and relationship with each parent.

Termination of Child Custody

Most types of child custody end when the child is emancipated or is considered a legal adult by being self-supporting, by marrying or by reaching the age of majority as stipulated by state law.

Consulting a child custody lawyer will definitely be a great advantageous if you want to be well-informed and be adequately prepared for dealing with your child custody case.

The following is a guide to filing for child custody in your divorce case.

Let the Family Attorney Know Your Purpose

Keep in mind that this is your time with the lawyer. Thus, you need to step up and determine the course of your consultation. Although it would be nice if the family attorney specifically asks you what you want to discuss, do not assume that this will take place. The more detailed you are with explaining your needs, the more contented you will be with the result of your consultation. If you have little or no idea about divorce and what it involves, let the family attorney know.

Take Notes

You must take down notes so that you may be able to remember what is said.  However, do not be so focused on writing everything down that you miss the big picture. Bear in mind that the consultation is partially an interview as well if you are looking to hire an attorney. You must determine if you are comfortable with the family attorney and it is not possible to do that if your nose is buried in your notebook.

Ask Questions

Prepare your list of questions that concerns your case and the family attorney. Make sure that you understand their explanation and that they were answered to your satisfaction. This is another method of learning about the family attorney and his or her communication style. The family attorney must be able to communicate with you in simple terms or be able to explain legal terms in a straightforward and understandable manner. You do not need to be highly specific but you do need to have a general idea of what it is you are looking for.

Do Not be Late

If the family attorney requires an intake form to be filled out before the appointment, arriving on time means that portion of your consultation time is used for filling out paperwork and you have just lost ten minutes of your consultation. When scheduling the initial appointment, make sure to find out when you are supposed to arrive and if there is an intake form, how long it basically takes to fill out.

Think Before Bringing Someone Along

It is not a good idea to bring your children along with you to a family law consultation because they are often the topic of discussion.  Also, bringing your best friend, parents, significant other, or another third party may not be the best option since they may possibly take over the consultation and tell you what you should or should not do. Remember that this is your case and your choice.

Bring Paperwork

Keep in mind that the more information you can provide the family attorney, the more case-specific advice you will gain from your consultation. Bringing your pay stubs, tax returns, credit card statements and other financial documents permits the lawyer to be more specific when discussing property division and child/spousal support.

You must ask your potential family law attorney as many questions as possible, so that you know he or she is a good fit for your divorce case. Once you have done that, here is a list of ten things you need to know from your divorce attorney.

Most of the time, divorce could start out okay but before it can even end, there is always the possibility that this can turn into a gruesome battle where it can cost a good amount of money, emotional distress and to some, may have a great psychological impact on the children. So many couples are wondering if there is any way to end a marriage without inflicting so much pain on each other.

The answer would be yes and you would be surprise to know that a divorce would have been easy if you started it the right way. Usually the cause of conflict starts by not taking a rational choice. And by rational, it means by taking time to consider a few things before jumping into a divorce process.

One of the most common mistakes a divorcing couple do is by taking what is front of them without looking at other options. They are in such hurry to end the marriage that they fall into the wrong strategy. If you want to have an easy divorce, then you must be careful about choosing a divorce attorney. Some divorce attorneys, as shocking as it is, tend to put the whole process in circles leaving you penniless and bitter. They don’t just entirely settle to a friendly divorce, after all, this is how they make their living. So you have to be careful not to fall victims of attorneys like these. It’s enough already that you have a divorce process to think about.

Be careful with lawyers who tend to give you false reassurance. They will tell you everything you need to hear. They will assure you that you will win and get most of the marital assets when the truth is, there are specific laws about the division of assets and properties between two parties. In some states, both parties have equal distribution when it comes to the assets and properties to be divided. The divorce attorney’s goal is to drain you and drag your case long enough so that he can get all the money he can from you. So do not be fooled. He may have the power to adjourn court dates or file the wrong court documents and still get paid by the hour.

So the easiest and the simplest way to get a divorce is to first consult a mediator. This, however, will only work if the other spouse agrees. Before getting a divorce lawyer, try to find out if you can work a divorce process while maintain a manner that is being civil to each other. If your spouse does not agree, then find the best lawyer you can have. Ask and consult people you know for recommendations and have a follow-up on meetings with lawyers before you make a final decision. Find a good lawyer with a good record and history of successful cases. A well known lawyer is always a good plus.

Lastly, keep in mind that while on the divorce process, it is not always fair. Sometimes it’s a win-win situation or a win-lose situation. It is a give and take process. But if your spouse is determined to drain you with every cent you own, it is always better to get yourself protected. So choose well before anything else.

This legal guide to family law can also help you be at ease throughout your divorce.

A contested divorce is basically a type of divorce in which one of the parties in the divorce settlement doesn’t agree with the terms in the divorce papers. The reasons may be due to various factors such as the children, assets, property, visitation, etc. If the divorcing couple has anything that is owned, it can also be contested in the divorce. This is the type of divorce that when the parties involved meet, they seem to be entering into a war zone. There are battles, negotiations, and counter-reactions almost every time the couple meets with their lawyers. Whether it is the wife or the husband that is contesting the divorce, it is still very traumatic for both parties in question.

In addition, if the divorcing couple has children who are below the age of 18, then there may also a need to contest for custody for the children. In this case, the children will have to struggle through the pain of not being able to live with both their parents. To make things easier, it is better to make a clear list of all assets and liabilities jointly owned by you and your spouse. When the divorce is final, you can also decide what you want out of your spouse, to help you in contesting the divorce with the right perspective.

On the other hand, a contested divorce comes with many legal entanglements and intense emotional and psychological trauma. Therefore, it is recommended to seek the advice of divorce service firms. Divorce services can help you ease the burden of the legal aspects of the divorce. The professionals working in this firm are skilled in using their streamlined approaches and expertise in the entire process of divorce. Also, they are capable to shorten the duration as well as the ugliness of the contested divorce.

These divorce solicitors firms that provide divorce services have people with sufficient legal knowledge to carry out in the divorce proceedings in a smooth manner at a very reasonable cost. They can expertly make the child custody decisions, division of property, and other related aspects to the dissolution of your marriage without difficulty. The costs of the divorce services will also be cut down to a great extent, which makes it less of a burden to you.

To finish the divorce proceedings as short and quick as possible, look for a reputable divorce solicitors firm that has a history in handling divorce cases effectively. It is a great assurance to have a sense of security that you would get the best out of your divorce service costs.

On the contrary, there are problems in a certain marriage that are so great in which divorce is the only possible solution. In this case, a divorce is the best option for all the people involved, no matter how painful it could get.

However, if you see some hope in saving your marriage, even though you and your spouse are thinking about divorce, you may try asking yourself these divorce questions before you make that final decision;

Do you still love the person you got married to?

It is the most significant question that you should ask yourself first, before going to a series of honest questions about your relationship. Do you have an answer to this question now? If the answer is NO, then you should definitely set an appointment with your divorce lawyer as soon as possible. It would be useless to move forward if the love you have for that person has completely gone away.

Is there something you need to get off your chest?

Are you keeping any information from your spouse that you must need to tell? If so, you may consider sharing these info with your spouse before you continue. It will be hard at first but you need to bring it out in the open in order for you to move on and heal the relationship.

Are there problems in your marriage that are very difficult to overcome?

Has something happened between your marriage that gives an absolute blockage in keeping you together?  There can be a kind of addiction such as alcoholism and gambling that must be stopped to be able to continue your relationship. Carefully scan your mind and heart for any issue or situation whose existence or memory makes the relationship very difficult to work well.

Are there any conditions for staying together?

If there has been an affair, a gambling issue, or something that has been done illegally that you do not respect, consider these things and what needs to happen before you are willing to commit to your relationship again.

Have you given everything you have for your relationship?

Perhaps, you and your spouse have been battling for the survival of your marriage for over many years but without much progress. Does it seem to be 2 steps forward and 3 steps backward? Leaving aside the reasons, contemplate and ask yourself if you have completely given the relationship your all. Maybe, you still have something left to give.

A divorce is really terrifying and nobody wants to go through it in the first place. Answering these divorce questions as honestly as you can is a huge step towards your final decision on whether to give the relationship another try or to finally call it quits.

These documents can contain certain information that ranges from property division to visitation rights and custody, if the spouses have children. Before filling out the divorce papers, it is important to talk to your lawyer first and have a clear statement as to what you want for yourself. Establishing a clear goal is important. If there are children involved in this, then it is important to know what the custody laws of your state are.

When obtaining the divorce papers, a quick visit to the County Clerk office is required for the proper forms because each state have their own guidelines and specific requirements for these types of documents. Once the process of filling up is complete, all the assets to be divided shall be listed so that it can be divided among parties. This involves a great amount of consideration among what is important. If a child or children are involved, custody is always the option. If you are a parent and seek custody of your child/children, then these will most likely become an important part on the whole process.

If the couple had a prenuptial agreement before the marriage, then these assets should be divided according to what was written and outlined in the prenuptial agreement. After dividing the assets that each party wants, the process of filling out the divorce papers is started. Most of the time, these documents have a basic outline and then varies when you reach the child custody laws.

It is important to remember that any legal action will be dictated by laws and has requirements by the state and the country you live in. Therefore it is advised to have an attorney with a wide knowledge when it comes to these parts.

Having a good lawyer will also help you obtain the right document if certain jurisdiction has their variations. The first part of a legal document that will be filed is the address and name of the jurisdiction, case number for future court reference, names of the parties involved in this case and others that the law requires. These are comprised of the “captions” or the upper portion of the first page. There is also a notary clause in legal documents; it is basically a sworn statement by a notary that a person fills out in the forms, declaring who they are.

When a person signs a notarized document, they are asked to swear in front of certain witnesses about their identity as well as presenting physical proof. In some cases, someone besides the attorney can help you fill out this legal form. If this occurs, the non-lawyers are required to disclose themselves to court so that the legal system will know who are the people involved in filling out the said papers.

Child support laws will dictate what is written in your divorce papers. Then Federal government of every state requires to supply their own forms when it comes to child custody and laws. You have to keep in mind that it is important to obtain correct and right forms before filing for divorce. In this way, you can know what type of custody law you will be having. If in any case, child custody is a hard battle, it is best to seek advises from a child support lawyer since most of the child custody revolves around the custodial parent with the most income. Once the child custody is understood, the process of divorce can move on to the next level.

That is why divorce papers are important. This is where the legal limitations mandated by the state, federal as well as county laws. This papers will attest to the wishes of both parties involved having been settled in front of the judge. Having the right attorney will make the entire divorce easy to handle.

Getting a Separation Agreement

Ask your divorce lawyer if you can get a separation agreement. Usually, a separation agreement needs an attorney but the agreement can expedite the divorce process.

How Judges Decide About Custody and Financial Support Issues

Remember that every state and case differs but finding out more about the process concerning child custody and alimony can certainly benefit you during divorce.

Calculation of Child Support

In some states, child support is awarded based on the number of children and a percentage of the income of the primary breadwinner. But your lawyer can help you know more about your chances as it involves your particular situation.

Eligibility for Social Security Benefits

Some individual’s may be entitled to an ex-spouse’s Social Security benefits. You may be eligible for some additional Social Security benefits when you turn 62 if you were married for a minimum of ten years. You must not be married at the time of the claim to collect benefits. You may be able to collect benefits at an earlier time if you are younger or have a disability.

The Lawyer’s Specialization

Depending on the intricacy of your divorce, you may want to only hire a certified family law specialist. A lawyer who only deals with divorce may be your best option particularly if alimony and child custody issues are involved.

The Attorney’s Fee

Being clear on the financial aspect is important when filing for divorce and hiring a lawyer. Ask your prospective lawyer how much he or she charges for your case as well as any additional fees such as the costs of telephone calls or photocopying.

How Long the Divorce Will Take

Divorce laws vary from in every state. If terms are disputed during the process, it may take several months. Asking your prospective lawyer how long your divorce may take can prepare you for a possibly overwhelming process.  This question and many others are answered on this law firm’s divorce faq page.

Qualification for an Annulment

Sometimes, you do not even need a divorce.  However, you must still ask an attorney for advice on an annulment. You may qualify for an annulment if you married a close relative, a member of the same gender, were unable to legally provide consent to the marriage due to age or a debilitating health condition. An annulment is different from a divorce because it legally considers the marriage as if it never existed.

The Necessity to Go to Court

Some divorces do not necessarily require a court hearing.  Qualified lawyers can help both parties reach a formal agreement regarding the dissolution of the marriage and financial support issues.

The Need for an Order of Protection

You may need an order of protection in cases of alleged domestic violence or child abuse. Documenting such claims is important toward your personal and financial protection.  Thus, you need to be sure to communicate with your attorney if this situation applies to your divorce case.

There is a need to understand child custody laws in order to keep the child’s best interests in mind. The following are some helpful tips you can do so that you can be able to further understand child custody laws.

The first resource you should consult is the court of jurisdiction. There is a great difference between child custody laws in one state to another state. For instance, in some states, a non-custodial parent may have a warrant sworn out for a custodial parent who does not comply with court ordered visitation. In other states, the non-custodial parent may need to file a suit. The same holds true with regard to child support payments.

Bear in mind that if the custodial parent moves to another state and takes the child along with him or her, the court of jurisdiction does not automatically change custody rights to that state. It can be changed at the request and approval of both parents. For instance, if child support is arranged in Massachusetts and the custodial parent now lives in Florida, family law in Massachusetts is still upheld.

If you are having difficulty understanding the legal vocabulary of child custody laws, there are a number of support groups that can assist you get a better grasp.

You may also use the internet to know more relevant information about how the child custody laws in your state are applied. This can provide you an idea of what could happen, given the same circumstances, as well as guide you with regard to the type of recourse you may have to consider if your former spouse is not complying with the legal custody and visitation arrangement that was ordered by the court.

Do not hesitate to ask if you do not understand something. This is why consulting a child custody lawyer is a beneficial step to take. You never know when some fine point of law may be very significant to your continued relationship with your child.

Ideally, both parents should work together to make certain their children are loved and properly taken care of even if the parents can no longer stay under the same roof. There are many divorced couples who do manage to make the situation work. However, you should be sure you understand child custody laws so that you can take full advantage of your rights as well as fulfill your obligations as a responsible parent.

Follow this link to learn more about child custody before your divorce case.

Take Control of Your Divorce

As much as possible, you and your spouse should keep control over your divorce by mutually deciding about certain issues such as division of assets or child custody and support. If there are certain aspects that you cannot agree upon, you may consult a divorce mediator to help you and your spouse negotiate and resolve difficult issues and minimize tension.

Take Care of Your Health

Divorce can also be physically draining so be sure that you eat a well-balanced diet, get adequate rest, and do activities that will help relieve stress. If you take good care of your health, you will be less likely to act upon extreme emotion such as resentment and frustration.

Establish Common Goals with Your Spouse

Work towards common goals in your divorce as to how you want to proceed with your divorce, what you want for your children, how you will communicate with each other during the divorce process, and how you will settle conflicts to achieve as much harmony as possible.

Understand Your Spouse’s Perspective

More often than not, people see things from their own viewpoint. It will be easier for you to negotiate a divorce settlement if you make the best effort to understand your spouse’s opinions and needs.

Establish a Parenting Plan

Establish a plan regarding future decisions about your parenting style, and parenting time as well as your children’s health, education, and emotional welfare. Decide whether you want joint custody or if one parent will have primary custody of the children. You should choose which home will be the children’s primary residence.

Make a Complete List of Assets

Include your real estate and retirement accounts and find out the value of those assets. Take account of assets that are jointly owned and those that are owned separately. Before proceeding with mediation session, decide how these assets will be distributed between the spouses.

Understand Your Debt Situation

Make a list of all credit cards, loans, outstanding bills, and mortgages and specify if the debt is under your name, your spouse’s name, or joint. Consider the income of each spouse and decide who will be accountable for paying each debt and when they should be paid.

List Your Income and Expenses

List all sources of your income and your monthly expenses as well as expenditures related to the divorce. Also, include your children’s expenses if they will be living with you.

Decide on the Lifestyle You Want Post-Divorce

Determine if you will be able to live the lifestyle you had during the marriage. Calculate each spouse’s financial needs by using your income and expense list.

Attempt Mediation

A mediator can help you in pursuing a friendly divorce by giving suggestions and advice to achieve a more positive outcome of your negotiation.

With appropriate planning and an honest desire to reach agreement, you and your spouse can achieve a friendly divorce.

Follow this guide to understand the divorce procedure so that you can be well prepared for your divorce.

Experience in Evaluating Your Options

Family law firms are experienced in handling divorce cases and can tell you at the onset the different courses of action that would be best for you in proceeding with your family law case including your options in issues such as child custody, division of property and debt, and child support.

Objectivity in Dealing with Your Case

A family law firm can be more objective about your family law case than you can especially when you get emotional because of these sensitive issues and will not make any careless decisions in dealing with your case. For example, when you may be persuaded to go for a speedy resolution of property division through an early settlement, your law firm’s attorney may advice you that it is in your best interests to wait for a more reasonable and equitable division.

Systematic Handling of Your Paperwork

A family law firm is complete with competent staff and experienced family law attorneys who can work through the confusing paperwork that are necessary in resolving your divorce and other family law cases in order for you to move on with your life.

Experts and Consultants

When dealing with family law matters particularly in complex cases where a couple has extensive property and financial interests involved, family law firms provide a team of legal experts and consultants who have extensive experience in specialized areas, and will speak competently to support your claims on the financial aspects of your case.

Alternative Dispute Resolution

A reputable family law firm will know whether your family law case may be best resolved through alternative dispute resolution processes such as mediation or collaborative family law.  These alternative dispute resolutions will most possibly save you time, money, and energy.

Experience Working With Competent Attorneys

A family law firm has family law attorneys that can deal most effectively and appropriately with the opposing counsel in every phase of the divorce process and even in informal settlement negotiations or in family court.

Constructive Settlement Agreements

Family law firms work hard to achieve the best settlement agreements for their clients as early as possible may it be divorce or any other kinds of family law cases.

Experience in Family Court

If it is necessary for your case to undergo a trial, a family law firm can provide a personal injury attorney who can keenly represent you in court and work toward reaching the best possible judge decision in your favor.

Indeed, getting the services of a family law firm can make you more secure and prepared in any family law case you may encounter.

About the Author

Charlie Welker is a family law author and speaker. You can read more of his posts at the New York Divorce Blog.